HUGE umbrellas give a poke in the eye.

So golf umbrellas (or any umbrella over 58″) have become very popular for everyday use.  Mostly sold to men (no big surprise there).  And not necessarily because of big, but a lot of people are getting injured by careless umbrella use in cities.  But let me tell you, an umbrella could poke my entire eye out, but no way I’d let the other person just walk off.  I’d pick up my eyeball and then chase them down (bumping into everyone because with one eye I lack depth perception) and beat them.

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Land’s End catalog = new porn.

The Lands’ End fall catalog is porn for the heartsick man. Who thought sixty pages of stylish-yet-practical clothing would employ models who are disturbing approximations of the lovely thirty-something woman who doesn’t want to put up with your shit anymore?…

These are images more invasive than any Victoria’s Secret spread, because they don’t inspire lust. This is a pornography of regret, and the longer you stare, the more seductive it becomes. These sixty pages are a self-pity trap; any sane lonely man would do well to avoid them…

You have to look closer to see what truly makes the models special, though, what elevates them above Victoria’s Secret: they have wrinkles around their eyes. These women have laugh lines, taut necks, and that slight tummy that can be so, so sexy. These are not the airbrushed dolls of ignorant fantasy. These women are real.

Now I don’t know how realistic these women are.  Of course more realistic than the non-human hotness that are VS models, but still these women are still too good looking, too thin, etc. to represent the real woman.  I’ve not seen a Land’s End catalog in awhile (not one I get), but from the article, this woman’s pretty hot.

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