Jack Russell Terrier

The Artist

You, my friend, are an artiste! Fuelled by a hounding sense of creativity and an untameable desire to express yourself, you see the world through rose-colored glasses one day and then wrestle the curtains closed and turn off the lights so you can ponder life the next. Your dog-eared journal is filled with brilliant ideas about rescuing the universe, yet you have trouble training your noggin on any one of them for any significant amount of time. Your originality occasionally manifests itself as performance art, and you love showing off your amazing athletic abilities in front of an audience. When it comes to taking on the leader of the pack, you’re not afraid to sink your teeth in - and won’t loosen your grip until you’ve gotten your point across.

Entertainment, Personal stuff | No Comments »

THE GREATEST TWO FIRST PARAGRAPHS IN THE HISTORY OF THE WRITTEN WORD:

I am a very busy and important man. I don’t need to tell you this. The shit I have to deal with every day would make your pubes turn white. Check it: While dictating that last sentence I did something complicated in Excel and pleasured my ex-wife the way that makes her cry and call her mother. OK?

Terrific. Point is, I’m all about maximum efficiency. E.g., I use “e.g.” instead of for example. It’s just faster, and classier.

That’s right, all of written word.  The rest of the article on the perfect length for pop songs found here.  Including this gem of a sentence: “It’s a mere two seconds longer but feels like it drags on for hours.”

By the way, as per usual, thanks to Kottke.

Entertainment | No Comments »

This is no time to be prejudiced one versus the other.  Use the Doomsday vault (f the seeds, save the people) kind of like Deep Impact.  And then hire the world’s best deep core driller and his team (because astronauts “don’t know jack about drilling” and you know drilling is “an art… a science” [who wrote that dialog?  Why do I even like this movie?]) to fly to the asteroid and plant a nuke (because we can’t just shoot it because that would be like shooting a speeding train with a beebee gun) like Armageddon.

1 in 450!  You have less a chance of winning the lottery than you do of an asteroid hitting the earth in 2036.  Which isn’t ALL that far off.  All that has to happen is the asteroid hit one of the 40,000 satellites around Earth.  I wonder if space trash counts, because we have a LOT of it.  Though an envelop of dust, like “nuclear winter” might help cool the planet from all the global warming (I kid, though there’s an argument for putting more particles in the atmosphere, similar to the particles we used to output with leaded gasonline, to help reflect radiation, etc. but that’s a whole other post.)

"Real" things, Science | 2 Comments »