HUGE umbrellas give a poke in the eye.

So golf umbrellas (or any umbrella over 58″) have become very popular for everyday use.  Mostly sold to men (no big surprise there).  And not necessarily because of big, but a lot of people are getting injured by careless umbrella use in cities.  But let me tell you, an umbrella could poke my entire eye out, but no way I’d let the other person just walk off.  I’d pick up my eyeball and then chase them down (bumping into everyone because with one eye I lack depth perception) and beat them.